Taurus 19-20 Wind, Clouds And Haste

by Alice

What life has chosen me?

This question I asked the Sabian
I had seen "the Lady in the Van" and Mary Shepherd (the vagabond) relayed to Alan Bennett (the playwright) that she had not chosen her life: it had chosen her.
This I thought presented a contrast to the current "new age" ideation of creating our own lives.
So I pondered the question above.

Taurus 19 - 20
Wind, Clouds and Haste (Sabian)
Bottles of Perfumed Oil (Pamian)
The Illusion of Conflict (Bekian)

Question:
Three symbols,
How are they connected?
Answer:
Each reside within the same degree of the zodiac.

Question:
How are the images similar?
Answer:
"Bottles of Perfumed Oils" have, if opened, the potential, like clouds to create an atmosphere, this may be pleasant and needed or may be distasteful and unwanted.
The question at the top of this page was sparked by "The Lady in the Van" and indeed she was looked at like the threatening vagabond, likened to the clouds, moving (wind) into the street. Most people moved away with "haste" when they saw her, because of her distasteful look and smell.
She lived in the playwright's driveway for 15 years, most of which created "the illusion of conflict" within him.
Clouds similarly, in this symbol produce an atmosphere of "haste", providing an "Illusion of Conflict".
None of us, on the surface, like conflict or it’s expression, as within the fabric of society at large, 'happiness and sunshine' are the sought after qualities within the human psyche.
Other emotions are left for the homeless, druggies, ill tempered and misfits of the community. Whilst the rest of us parade our satisfaction with life with prideful glee.


How is this relevant to my life?
As I am looking at this question through the eyes of no-personal-choice-but-life-as-an-entity-choosing-me-to-experience-this-degree, what comes to mind immediately is:
Currently out the front of where I work (a "health service") lives a "homeless street dweller", and yes he creates an "illusion of conflict" not only within myself but most people whom view his living circumstances.
This being from wanting to be the good samaritan, in which he bites back, 'not wanting help' to move on and clean up his act.
In fact he never intrudes on anyone's space, cleans and folds his blankets every morning before the practice starts up for business and is not seen till well after dark. Similar to a cloud appearing then moving on, and never raining upon the "hastily" moving rain warriors.
This would describe perfectly my life, worrying about every loose thread of my existence.
An example:
My eldest son was going camping with the wind and clouds brewing, I suggested that he pack his mattress in his 4WD, and not take the small, cramped 2 man tent, as of course, he might get wet and uncomfortable.
His answer "mum I might want that experience",so I learnt in fact it was his decision and if he needed to float in his tent that was his choice. And no it didn't rain!
My original work was in a busy Emergency Room which of course reflected my inner journey of this degree. What I did learn was that about 5% of the work actually was an emergency and the rest was sortable misjudgements.
The degree "Wind,Clouds and Haste" lives in my third house, of siblings, and my younger brother was the king of "crying wolf" about illnesses. This was his method of controlling what he wanted and abdicating responsibility for his actions.
So I grew up in that environment of having to decide if he was seriously ill or not. Maybe this is why I chose nursing to give me more skills to judge his behaviour. Sometimes I wonder how conscious of our choices we are when we are young.
I have a grand trine in water, Moon square Neptune and a Piscean Ascendent, so sometimes my decisions are not always based on fact, but the inner urge to help.
Maybe I need to be more discerning about when to provide the brolley for the wind and clouds or maybe I divert storms by my misjudgement of how serious other and my crises are.
We don’t have the convenience of the movie "Sliding Doors",therefore the effects of our actions will never really be known, had we chosen another tack.
Does the life we have pumping through our veins need controlling through understanding of its creative potential, instead of being a burden that we dream of escaping.
The gift this life has given me "your intent is the most important thing".
When "wind and clouds" appear, take note of your surroundings, calm your "illusionary inner conflict", choose your "perfume bottle" and make "haste".

"She slept on clouds made of perfume, her conflicts carried by wind and she prompted the dance of haste."


Does any part of the symbol resonate with you?

Share your experiences of this Taurus karma!

Do any of the astrological bodies (Venus, Jupiter, Chiron etc) fall on this symbol for you? What has it meant in your life?

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Many thanks!